Welcome to Trump Law School, a new streamlined education that only takes three months to teach you what other top law schools take three years. We have an innovative, interactive method of teaching students that will enable them to match the skills and methods of all the top MAGA lawyers making todays headlines!

Prerequisites: You will need at least two years of any college a high school degree (home schooled is acceptable) and a letter from your pastor.* Felony convictions shall only result in disqualification for financial aid recipients.

Tuition: $100,000.00 nonrefundable fee for all three months.* Trump Law School is not accredited but this will not prevent you from taking Bar Exams in Mississippi, Arkansas, Louisiana, Texas, South Carolina and West Virginia. Florida is pending on the governor's wife's fraud case. Our graduates will be placed in crucial positions within the Government (as long as Trump gets a third term).

Courses:
Ice Ice Baby. New uses and means for an organization previously underutilized and underfunded. Students will learn about sovereign immunity for use of force cases and neat tricks like deporting people who file civil cases against ICE agents. There will also be a special chapter on private contractors and holding facilities with an emphasis on avoiding freedom of information requests. Guest Video Speaker Pam Bondi with a personalized video only for Trump Law School where she explains exceptions are now the rule and how to answer questions with questions.

Killing Drug Dealers. The course will start with the Venezuelan enemy combatants and the use of the military to stop these terrorists literally dead in their tracks, or wakes as chance would have it. Only a new Law School can explain the new way of doing things, like killing drug dealers is now legal and making all drug dealers "enemy combatants" and terrorists to avoid onlookers, do gooders, do nothings and naysayers (congress).
Guest Video Speaker Marco Rubio, who has made a topical, current and relevant video only available to Trump Law School students where he shares his more recent changes of opinions on all of these brave, bold new measures.

Revenge! The law is now a tool to be used against your enemies, plus a way to make your enemies the enemies of the state. Its not for those students who don't want to get their hands dirty, this is now how things are done and how our students will be getting them done in the third term. Special Guest Video speaker Kash Patel, who will explain the role of FBI and the importance of "credible" evidence as it relates to the blind spots that loyalty creates.

Making Law Firms and Universities play ball. This is a course about withholding money, filing lawsuits and punishing people for their hate speech. Withholding federal funding, denying top secret clearance to law firms representing your enemies, frivolous lawsuits against huge corporations seeking mergers and publicly labeling large institutions as traiterous is all in a days work here. Guest Speaker to be determined.

Constitutional Law or whats left of it, has been shortened from a year course to an astounding three weeks, focusing on our brilliant conservative majority's originalism against abortion and living document approach to Presidential immunity. This revolutionary results oriented approach clears the thicket of centuries of outdated and archaic notions of jurisprudence and stare decisis. Special Video Guest speaker John Roberts, who will focus almost exclusively on having good intentions when you do bad things and ask for civility when people call you out. Only Trump Law School owns a speaker like this.

Going Forward with Stephen Miller. Project 2025 is so last year, so the new focus is on this year with Miller's inspiration carefully taken from the practical successes of pre to mid century European power politics and the legality of making every action an emergency to get around the clear prohibition against it. There will be an added emphasis on placing like minded Judges throughout the land and filing cased before them.

Saving Money and DOGE Ballers. This course cracks the nut that was previously thought impossible. Bring someone from the outside in, give them a literal and figurative chainsaw ( and a legal scrip for ketamine, adderall and maybe prozac), and have them force every bureaucrat to explain their job after you fire them to see if you need to rehire them. The legality of this is crucial, and since there is no legal leg to stand on, the legal ability to delay, deny, distract, postpone and obfuscate are the tools the student learns. Scheduled speaker was stricken and his name removed from the temple and erased from history but that has changed so stay tuned for guest speaker to be announced.


Billionaires. We couldn't do it without them. The course shows you how billionaires are either your best friends or your worst enemies. Making friends with billionaires is crucial and making them cabinet members and ambassadors makes them your public relations cheer leaders with no budget constraints. Students will be taught where to grow these billionaire's monopolies to keep them inside the tent. Special Video Guest speaker is likely Jeff Bezos, who explains the give and take with real world examples like his 40 million dollar book deal for our brilliant and beautiful first lady and not endorsing Kamala in his newspaper.

Upon graduation from this prestigious modern law school, each student will be given a large golden (6 karat) class ring that shows everyone you belong in the world of movers and shakers. It will also give you a 5% discount on Maralago membership and Mcdonalds. While there will certain progressive blue states that still require graduation from an accedited law school to take their bar exams, but who cares? the Trump Law School degree is accepted every place anyone who knows where red hats are required. Its shorter, more expensive and more direct than any other law school out there. Everyone says that this is the perfect new way to educate the kind of lawyers Maga needs.

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"One of the reasons why propaganda tries to get you to hate government is because it's the one existing institution in which people can participate to some extent and constrain tyrannical unaccountable power." Noam Chomsky.

$100,000 grand? That's quite a bargain to gain access to the world of extortion, teen sex, bribery and secret bank accounts.



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I was right.